Drop everything now, meet me in the pouring rain
by Miss Eleanor Rigby
Summary: A bit based on Taylor Swift's song, Sparks Fly. Clare's parents' divorce is tearing Clare apart, and Eli's picking up the pieces and trying to put her back  together.
1. Edwards

"Hello?" He sounded groggy. I remembered too late that it was 3 AM.

"Hey, Eli... I'm sorry. Did I wake you?" I asked.

"Clare. No, no, it's fine. Are you okay?"

"Yeah, yeah. I'm fine..." That was a lie and I knew it. everything was most certainly NOT fine. I couldn't sleep, my parents had been screaming at each other for hours

on end. I think I heard a few glasses break, even.

"So that must be why you called me at 3:30 in the morning."

"Oh. Yeah," I said distantly, winding my fingers around the cord on my phone.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have called. I'll let you go back to bed. Bye." I said, hoping he wouldn't hang up.

"Clare," said the voice one the other end of the phone. I paused.

"I know you didn't call me just to say you're sorry for waking me up. What's really going on? Is it your parents again? Are you okay?" He sounded concerned.

I sighed. "It's just... I can't sleep. My parents. They've been screaming at each other for hours. I'm scared. I just... I need a distraction or something."

"Want me to come over?"

"Eli, you can't. It's 3 in the morning."

"3:33, to be exact." He said.

"Exactly."

"Sneak out?" he asked. I agreed immediately.

"Where to?"

"How about the park?" Eli suggested.

I looked out the window as a lightning bolt struck somewhere in the sky.

"But it's raining," I sighed.

"But I have a car," he retorted. Oh, Eli.

"Okay. Um, park 2 driveways down so they won't notice. Call me when you get here. Okay?"

"9 minutes." he said.

I hung up, reluctantly. I now had no more sounds to drown out the screaming of my parents. did they really have THAT much to argue about?

I plopped back down, throwing a pillow over my head.

Wait! Eli's headphones. I'd forgotten all about those.

I put my phone on vibrate so I wouldn't miss his call and slipped the noise-cancelling headphones on, and closed my eyes. It was incredibly quiet. I felt so peaceful. I

just laid there for a few minutes, relishing the quiet. I was just starting to slip off, then-

BZZZZZZ. BZZZZZZZZZ. BZZZZZZZZZZZ. Eli must be here.

I threw the headphones off and answered.

"Hey," I said.

"Hey babe. I'm here."

"Okay. Be there in a second."

"You sure you can get out without your parents seeing?"

I scoffed. "Yeah, I'm positive. If the house caught on fire they're be too busy screaming at each other to even notice that everything around them is going down in

flames."

Before the words were out, I realized that was how it already was. Their marriage was going down, and along with it was me, and everything I ever knew. And they

didn't even realize it. Or did they? Did they even care that they were destroying me, along with themselves and their marriage, everything they'd ever worked to

build?

"Clare..."

"No, I'm fine. I'll see you in a sec."

I hung up as the tears welled up in my eyes. Hurriedly, I put on my Degrassi hoodie, slipping the hood on. I checked the mirror to make sure I didn't look _too _disgusting. But, of course, I did. My eyes were red and puffy for the crying, and to top it off I hadn't had any sleep. It wasn't pretty. Oh well.

Being sure not to step on any of the creaks, I made my way down the stairs and slipped out the back door and around the house, my heart skipping a beat when I saw Morty waiting, with Eli leaning against the hood in the pouring rain.

"Eli! Are you crazy! It's like five degrees out here! You're going to catch something." I said, running towards him.

"The only thing I plan on catching is you," He said, suddenly scooping me up in his arms and crushing his lips against mine.

After he put me down, he looked at me, laughed and said "That has to be the cheesiest thing I've ever done. In my entire life. No joke." I laughed along with him. It felt so good to laugh. I noticed he was shivering. "God, You must be freezing." I stated. I looked at him. He didn't have to do this. He nodded, smiling.

"To the car?" He asked.

"Sounds good to me." I replied.

So we got in, cranked up the heat, and took off to the park.

I asked him to turn the radio on, even though he and I disagreed on music. I didn't care. I just didn't need to think for a few minutes. I needed to get myself together.

When we got to the park, he just looked at me for a second, taking in all of my puffy-faced glory.

"You alright?"

I sniffled, and nodded, even though I was already starting to feel better. Truth is, the moment I saw him leaning against his car in the rain, waiting for me, the butterflies in my stomach took off and I began to feel better.

"I just wish I knew what to say. But I mean, I've never been through that. I just don't want to say the wrong thing..." He said.

"Just being here is helping. You really didn't have to come get me. It's 3 am, after all." I told him.

"4, now," he corrected. "And I did. You needed me, and it's my job to make you feel better, _girlfriend. _I care about you."

I still couldn't believe that he did that. For me.

"So, do you want to talk about it? I've been through the whole therapy thing before, and trust me, it helps."

I sighed. "It's just. I've always looked up to them. I never, ever saw this coming. They just seemed so perfect, so happy. I didn't even think the word 'divorce' was in their vocabulary. But now, it's like nothing that I think I know is real. Everything I've ever looked up to or believed in is gone. Fading. Disintegrating right before my eyes. And there's nothing I can do to stop it. And, I just have this constant feeling of guilt. Like it's all my fault, like I should've done more to stop it, you know?"

I looked at Eli. He had a hard expression on his face, and his gaze was far away.

"Yeah. I do know," He said.

_Oh. Julia. He really did know. Not the parents divorcing thing, but the overwhelming guilt part._

"Eli. I'm so sorry." I said.

He looked at me and faked a smile. "All good." he said, looking back at the steering wheel.

"And It's not your fault, Clare. You should know that."

"Yeah, I know." I said. _Lie. _I'm just... having doubts." I said, biting my lip to stop it's shaking.

"Doubts?" he said, looking at me.

"Yeah. They used to be so in 'love,' " I said.

"You know, they were so perfect for each other. They couldn't stand to be apart. And now, they can't stand to be together. I'm just starting to wonder... if there's really such a thing as love. I mean, I thought love was supposed to last? And, you know, if love doesn't last, what's the point of ever getting married if it's just going to end one day, leaving a mess of kids, a broken family, and child support checks? And if there's no such thing as love, and there's no point in marriage, then what's the point of this?" I asked softly, gently tracing my purity ring with my finger. I was babbling. The idea haunted me though, so I kept on.

I smiled faintly. "You know, my mom bought this for me when I was nine."

I looked out the window.

"She told me, 'Clare, this ring is very special. You're making a promise to yourself and to God that you'll save yourself for your one true love. You'll find him someday, and like in a fairytale, you'll live happily ever after. Like your father and I.' What I realize now, though, is there's no such thing as true love, or happily ever after. I don't believe in any of that. It's bullshit." Did I just_ curse?_ What was wrong with me?

I looked at him. He looked shocked as well. But I went on.

"Why should I spend my teenage years, the 'best of my life' being so careful and cautious, and not having any fun if this is the best it's ever going to get?"

I thought for a second.

"How can I even believe in _anything_ anymore?" I said, then peered out the window into the pouring rain, watching individual drops slide down the window.

Suddenly, a thought struck me, filling my eyes with tears. "You know what? Even we're going to end some day, Eli," I choked out. The thought hurt; It killed me.

"Clare..." he groaned, looking pained. I continued,

"And when we do, then I'll have nobody. You're the only person who makes me feel even a little bit better about this, about myself, about everything. I need you, Eli." I said, tears rolling down now. My life without him was unimaginable. I couldn't bear the thought of it.

"I need you," I whispered, realizing the truth of the sentence.

" I don't want us to break up. I need you. I n-" He cut me off with a kiss. One of those beautiful, 'Hush, everything will be okay' kisses. My favorite.

"Shh. Don't worry about that now, Clare. Everything ends. But there's no point in ever doing anything if you're just going to dwell on the expiration date. Just enjoy it while it lasts. I mean, who knows? It might last a lot longer than you think. But only if you don't think about it." He said.

His green eyes were calming me as I peered into them. I hugged him. I truly needed this boy. Nobody I knew would be able to say the right things and calm me and stop me from my craze Clare psycho-babble. What was I going to do when we broke up?

_Was it going to be me or him that gets hurt?_ I wondered, _Because you know somebody will. It's impossible to break up without at least one person getting hurt. That's just how it works. Right then, I vowed it wouldn't be me. I wasn't sure how, but I'd find a way. I don't want to hurt like my mother. I looked at Eli pitifully. He was peering outside thoughtfully._

_I reached down and slid my purity ring off my finger, then rolled the window down and quickly chunked it out. I didn't need that anymore._

_"What was that?" Eli asked, snapped out of his daze._

_"Nothing." I told him._

_He took my hand lacing my fingers with his, and then peered down at my hand._

_"Clare. Why did you throw your purity ring out of the window?" He asked me._

_"I didn't." I said quickly._

_"I see. Did it magically turn invisible then?" He said sarcastically, narrowing his eyes. I sighed and then shrugged my shoulders._

_"No... I just... realized that I don't believe in it anymore." I looked down. _

_"It doesn't stand for anything... 'Love waits;' There's no such thing as love, Eli. I'm not throwing my teenage years away for no reason. From now on, I plan to start living in the moment, regardless of the consequences. I'm going to start living to please myself, for once. I just want to enjoy myself. Enjoy my life, my happiness. While it lasts." I said decidedly. He looked at me lovingly, with a trace of concern in his emerald eyes. I felt a jolt in my stomach. How did he always do that?_

_"Clare," He said, "I see where you're coming from, and how you could think that. But, just because your parents aren't right for each other doesn't mean there's no such thing as love, you know. You're upset." _

_He thought for a second. _

_"You're upset and you're tired and you're not thinking clearly, Clare. Now I'm going to go get your ring. I want you to think about it tomorrow when you're rested and feel better. And I want you to wear it until you decide for sure that that's what you want, what you believe in. I learned a long time ago not to make decisions when I'm upset," He said, trying to calm me. _

_I knew I was scaring him. I was being irrational. _

_"Eli, I don't believe in anything," I sighed, exasperated. Had he not heard what I'd just said? Just like my father with my mother, he never listened to me. The thought of being like my parents enraged me. "Don't you dare go out there and get that stupid, meaningless piece of crap! It's a stupid hunk of worthless metal, Eli. And if you so much as step out of the car, I'm walking home. Who knows, maybe I'll get hit by a car or something! One can only hope!" Oh no. What did I just say? No, no, no. I didn't mean that. I didn't realize what I was saying. Oh, Eli._

_He looked at me, and I could see the pain in his eyes. A pain so deep it hurt me, too._

_"Oh, Eli. I'm so sorry. I really didn't mean that. I wasn't thinking and it just came out. I'm so, so sorry, Eli. I didn't realize..." I just stopped, as my tears found their way out. I looked at him, and a tear was rolling down his cheek. I felt a pang in my gut. He was hurting. Because of me. I always messed everything up. _

_We sat in silence for a few minutes. I was scared to say anything. I felt incredibly bad. I knew better than to bring up Julia. Especially like that. How could I? I was so stupid._

_"Want me to take you home now?" He said suddenly, sharply. I could tell he was hurting. I hurt for him. _

_I nodded._

_"I'm really, truly sorry, Eli. I just-" _

_"Forget it." He said as he cranked up the car. I looked at the clock as a tear rolled down my cheek. _

_5:43. I bet they never noticed I was gone._


	2. Goldsworthy

_**Editor's note-**_

**Thanks everyone for the great reviews! Sorry if it was a bit confusing at first in the last chapter, my computer screwed up the spacing and everything when I uploaded it and didn't realize. Oops. It's mostly fixed now, a little screwy at the top, but it's a **_**lot**_** less confusing now. This one's a bit shorter, a day in the life of our dear Eli.**

**Please, continue to review it, critique it, anything! Enjoy ;)**

_RIIIIIIIING RIIIIIIIING RIIIIIIIING RIIIIIIIIING!_

I opened one eye to look at the stupid alarm clock. 6:45. AM.

Really? Did I _have_ to go to school? I'd just gotten an astonishing 9 minutes of sleep.

First I'd been up with Clare all night. Her parents were fighting again, so she snuck out and I drove her to the park to talk. I thought she was doing better, but suddenly she just flew off the handle. Nearly yelling at me, throwing her purity ring out the window, _swearing_? And not to mention that stab towards Julia. I couldn't help but wonder if it was something I'd said. I was just trying to help her.

I sat up in the bed, rubbing my eyes and yawning.

After I'd gotten home, (6:17 after dropping Clare off) I just couldn't fall asleep. Thinking about Clare. Then Julia. And then back to Clare again.

She'd decided she didn't believe in love anymore. But what about me? What did this mean for us? The thought of the two of us ever ending stung, hard. Hopefully she didn't mean it though. She was _pretty _upset, after all. I glanced at my framed picture of Julia, my last reminder of her, and turned it facedown. It hurt too much to look at, and feel the pain and overwhelming guilt all over again. I still couldn't believe Clare had said that last night. Or this morning. Whatever.

_"If you so much as step out of the car, I'm walking home. Who knows, maybe I'll get hit by a car or something! One can only hope!_"

My eyes stung. That would not happen. Not again. If anything happened to Clare because of me, I just couldn't live with myself. She must've known she was reopening a wound. But I still couldn't really blame her for what she said. She _was_ having a hard time, I reminded myself. Her parents had been arguing for weeks. She was probably getting less sleep than me, if that's possible. I'd struggled with insomnia ever since the accident. Plus, she'd had a particularly rough night. All of her dreams had come crashing down. She'd been crying for hours, I could tell by looking at her. She couldn't help being a little cranky. But still.

I got up, finally, and walked to my closet, selected a black shirt (did I own another color?) and a scarf just for the heck of it, and got dressed. I went to brush my teeth and took a quick look in the mirror. Wow. I looked _rough._ That's what a lack of sleep and rough emotions will do for you. I looked at the clock to make sure I still had plenty of time before school started. I had something quite important to do first.

I walked into school just minutes before the first bell rang. Clare's ring had been harder to find than I thought it would be, but I finally spotted it lying just under a bush. It was now in Morty's glove box, safe and sound, waiting for Clare to take it back. She would change her mind about all of the things she said last night. I just knew it. It wasn't like Clare to just abandon her beliefs like that. She'd change her mind. Just watch.

I wandered down the hall, in no real hurry to get to 1st period. I truly, _truly_ hated gym class. Shouldn't it be illegal to do any physical activity before 10 AM?

On my way, I bumped into a strawberry-blonde haired mess. Or should I say, she bumped into me.

"Sorry," Clare whispered before looking up at me, her eyes growing a little brighter.

"Clare, hey, how are you feeling?" I asked.

"Mmph," she groaned.

I gave light laugh. "I feel you."

"Listen," she said, "thanks a lot for last night. It really meant a lot to me. And I'm sorry about losing my temper on you. And saying that..." She looked up at me, those striking blue eyes full of regret.

"Babe, don't worry about it. It's fine. It's not your fault." I told her and gave her a quick kiss to lighten the mood. She blushed and gave me a quick smile, then pulled a little further away from me, frowning.

"What?" I asked, concerned.

"Huh? Oh, nothing, I'm fine. I'm just tired. Long night," she said with a small laugh. Her eyes looked distant, as if she was having an internal debate. I was unconvinced, but dismissed it. She was probably half asleep, and I knew how she could be.

"Your parents didn't catch you or anything, did they?" I asked.

She scoffed. "Of course not. But, luckily they were asleep by the time I got back. Dad crashed on the couch, Mom upstairs." She said with a frown.

The warning bell rang.

"Well, I need to get to math. Can't be late," she said, still frowning, and began walking away.

"Yeah. See you in English, babe," I called after her. A small backwards wave in return. _She's just tired,_ I told myself. _that's all_.

In English, Clare barely talked to me. Or anyone, really. She either took notes furiously, or sat and stared at her paper blankly. Once again, I blamed it on the lack of sleep. When the bell rang, I decided to try and talk again.

As she began to walk towards the door, I grabbed her waist from behind, like I always do. "Hey, Edwards." I said, smirking. She looked at me "Oh, hey Eli."

"Me and you, after school?" I asked hopefully. She thought for a moment as we arrived at her locker, the

blank expression still on her face.

"Um. I think I'm just gonna go home. I'm really tired, so I'm probably gonna go to sleep?" She said.

"Oh, okay."

"You can come over if you want? My parents won't be home till later." It didn't really sound like an invitation, more like an obligation on her side.

"Nah, that's okay. You catch up on your sleep, and text me or something when you wake up. Okay, babe?" I kissed her on the cheek.

"Okay. I'll talk to you later."

"Do you want me to give you a ride home?"

She shrugged. "Sure."

"Alright. Morty and I will be waiting. 3 'o clock," I said with a smile. She returned it halfheartedly.

"See ya," She said, and ventured on to her next class.

The whole ride home, she was silent. She rested her forehead against the window and closed her eyes. She must've been exhausted. I couldn't wait to talk to her when she felt better. I knew she was tired, as was I, but I couldn't help but feel like something was wrong. I just needed to talk to her when she felt normal and

confirm that I was wrong about that. I just needed to know that everything was okay.

Later that night, on Facebook, I logged in for about 3 minutes, out of sheer boredom. Clare was still asleep, I figured, and Adam was… Being Adam. I really hated social networking sites, and I'd only made a Facebook because Clare and Adam had so sweetly persuaded me to do so. Oh, the things did do for love. My heart skipped a beat when I saw Clare's status update from… 6 minutes ago? _"Better by far you should forget and smile than that you should remember and be sad."_ Wait, wasn't she asleep? Because she wasn't texting me back. And she said that she would talk to me when she woke up. Right?

"_Damn it damn it damn it, calm yourself, Goldsworthy. Everything's fine, don't worry about it," _came the voice in my head. "_There's got to be an explanation. You know Clare would never avoid talking to you. Chill."_

I tried calling her, and got voicemail after a few rings. What was going on? I decided to take my own advice for once, and just chill. I tried to pass the time while I waited for her to call, text, IM, something. By midnight, I was staring at my phone, still waiting.

The thing is, though, my phone didn't ring once.

_**Hmm, what's going on with Clare and Eli? Things don't seem too great, do they? Is she gonna break up with him? Why would she do that? ;)I should have the new chapter by next week. **_

_**REVIEW!**__**J**_


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